Sunday, October 21, 2012

Viva la Vivāha

It is going to be a little more than two months since I've got married and I don't have a single post on the wedding stuff. Bad, no? Here are some salient points from the experience.
  • The jee-i'm-actually-gonna-get-married feeling sunk in when Sindhu (my wife) & I started plan the look and layout of our wedding invitation. We had a simple design in mind and were particular on the colour, texture and feel of the invitation card & cover. Menaka, Eureka, Butterfly, Kalyani, Sankeshwara took a lot of running around to get what we wanted. We got there in the end.
  • I totally relished the Maapla treatment at home. It is a super feeling of being the star of the show. You're lavished with attention from everyone. Want something? Just look up...and ten people will be hanging on to the word you say.
  • Couple of days before the wedding, my brothers & I went for a grand beauty treatment to a men's parlour in Mandavali. I had the Groom's Special which had the full works - Diamond facial, bleach, scalp massage, haircut, manicure, pedicure etc. All this took the whole day! My brother found out how ticklish he's on his feet during his pedicure. He just couldn't sit still. The beauty trip was very relaxing and we were refreshed at the end of it.  Everything was great except that ghastly five-figure amount we got billed for their services. 
  • My grand-dad had it. My dad had it. My uncle had it. My cousin had it too. But, more importantly, one Mr Kameshwaran from my favourite Thamizh movie had it. And I decided long time back I was gonna have it when it is my time. Janavasam. I had it. And I totally loved it.
  • It was a typical Tambram wedding...peppered with the highs and extreme highs and thereof (emotionally speaking).
  • People marry. Some re-marry. But you get married for the first time only once. Pah, wattey logic, you may say. The point is - when you do something which you can do only once, why not do it properly? I dug into my reserves of patience and cooperated with whatever rituals I had to do from my part. The motto was: Cooperate, don't kovama operate.
  • Talking about doing things properly - the Sastrigal told us to NOT shake hands with anyone after Mangalya dharanam until he tells us to do so. "Nee avala mattum dhaan thodalaam. Vera yaaraiyum thoda pdaadhu. Purinjidhaa?" #haun. He informed the handshake ban to the audience through microphone. After the Thaali was tied, once the rain of akshadhai and flowers subsided, one Maama ignored the handshake ban and extended his hand with a megawatt smile only to be met with a huge NO from me. Not the one to be cowed away easily, Maama insisted again, the Sastrigal belted out a high decibel bark "Kozhandha correct-a kai kudukka maaten 'granono, yen padutharel! Apram vaango saar!". Got the nods of approval from junior sastrigals and the photographer.
  • I got a candid photographer to cover the event. I closely followed some photographers who specialize in this and boy they are a creative bunch! Glad I had PV cover my wedding. Check out his work here.
  • Panjakacham is an underrated men's garment. 
  • My mum planned to put together a surprise video of me & Sindhu to be played after Janavasam. But poor thing was smashed for time with the wedding prep that she couldn't do much on apart from collating old photographs. She really wanted it to happen so I (with some help from my bro) made a video which was basically a time-line with photos from memorable stages/events in our life and some funny anecdotes thrown in. We played it after Janvaasam. Everybody loved it.
  • Nalangu was a total riot. I sung this song. The family were in their element and reached resonant galaata frequency when I prompted them for chorus. I still wonder how they made me sing 3 songs (incl. a duet) compared to her two songs. I tell you, girls have this amazing ability to slither away from spotlight.
  • We went to Seychelles for honeymoon.
Some changes happen gradually. Sometimes you acknowledge a change is taking place but you don't realise the change until a particular moment. During oonjal ceremony, I looked at the huge gathering of people around us. Before me were persons who were involved in my life in various degrees - like my 2nd standard Sanskrit teacher, cousins I used to play with, classmates, my aunts, my mum - people who were in some way from my birth, childhood, till that point in my marriage played a part in me being the person I am. Looking at them, I felt stock of the changes that has happened in my life. Its moments like these in my wedding and other moments that I am unable to put in words, but are imprinted in my mind far better than any HD camera can record, that made my wedding a happy and emotionally satisfying experience.