The moment of blankness

The moment of blankness? Let me explain.

This is the state your brain momentarily goes in when:

a. you are asked a question or an opinion. You give a monosyllable answer. "xyz is like that. Don't you think so?" "ya". Silence. The other person waits for you to elaborate but quite simply you don't have anything else to add. Sometimes, you know what to say. You have lot more to add. But, suddenly, in that particular instant of time, you blank out. If I can put a picture to this moment of 'thinking', it'll be a bright white image. 2-minutes after that, all the ideas/thoughts come flooding in. Arghh!

b. you've been chatting with a complete stranger. All common conversational topics are dealt with. The conversation is now interspersed with long awkward pauses and it finally comes to grinding halt. You both experience a loud silence. You try to conjure up a question/topic but nothing comes in mind. Not a zilch! A quick blank look and an artificial smile are exchanged...both parties desperate to bail out of tete a tete. (I don't experience this anymore. My friend does! If need be, I tactfully wriggle myself out.)

Social butterflies don't seem to experience this at all. They seamlessly move from person to person. One conversation to next. Being masters of small talk, they can keep going on and on without communicating anything significant. Certain traits are in-born I guess.

It is interesting this 'blankness' rarely happen when in company with a close friend or family. Is it because there is an inclination to communicate? A willingness to open up? We tend to listen more and we actually care?

c. you are hard-pressed to make a nothing-to-say-but-u-better-say-something-to prove-u-mentally-exist-in-this-room statement in a group discussion.

d. learning a new subject (you read the theory and go um-humm...then? and go back reading)

e. writing - a blog post or a letter - esp. writing philosophical, arts topics. God!

Have you experienced this?

Speech seems to be idiosyncratic to the level of person's thinking 'processes' at a given time.

I see, but you 'no' see

We see strangers everyday. Some strangers are not absolute strangers because we tend to see them everyday e.g. in the bus/train while going to work, in the street, random person at work etc. There is no conversation apart from the odd 'Hello' when the eyes accidentally meet. You acknowledge that the other person exists. No one says a word. Not because they are bad or horrible, they may actually be genuinely nice people, but they are strangers.

When you happen to meet the same person again in a different place, what do you do?

Some people, like me, smile and say 'Hello'. They know the other person. According to them, their relationship with the person has changed from a stranger to 'this guy/girl from...' i.e. an acquaintance.

Other people just plainly ignore. They struggle, but still succeed, in avoiding eye-contact. Some people are adept in avoiding eye-contact. From their body language and facial expressions, you know that they 'know' but they still pretend that they don't 'know'. They recognise you and immediately pretend that they haven't.

Why? I do not understand this.

Is it:

a. fear
b. reluctance to talk until introduced
c. they just don't give a sh*t

Or am I missing a point altogether?

Crowd at The Gabba

It was a hot Saturday afternoon at the Brisbane Cricket Ground (colloquially called The ‘Gabba) in the first test match between the Trans-Tasman rivals Australia and New Zealand. The scorching heat and humidity made me run towards the sparse strip of shade in the Grandstand as the sun tilted towards west. Under this thirty-six degree heat, Tim Southee was under the cosh as Simon Katich smashes consecutive fours. Daniel Vettori, the NZ captain, has a word with his tired bowler and they make few changes to the field set up while delicately balancing attack and defence.

Amongst all this action, there was something strange happening in the background. Something…it has always been there but there is something more to it now. Ah, it’s the crowd, no the crowd noise. A section of the crowd in the adjacent grandstand, mainly Australian supporters – majority of them holding a plastic tumbler of cold beer on one hand and a plastic soft-drink bottle on the other, shouting:

“Cullum’s a wanker,

tum dum, tum, tum dum” (by tapping the plastic bottle on the seats)

Whenever a new player takes field position near that particular section of the crowd; they welcome him by chanting on his name. I have heard this particular crowd chant before in test matches in NZ and I should admit I found it quite funny the first time I heard it (especially the way the rhythm is maintained by tapping the plastic bottles for “tum dum, tum, tum dum” or by clapping).Calling a person a wanker is insulting. But it didn’t stop there. NZ players were subjected to continuous abuse from crowd with comments like “Faggots”, “F**k off Kiwis/NZ” etc. This resulted in a verbal and physical altercation between Australian and NZ supporters. Ten people were evicted from the stadium.

Australian crowds abusing players is not a new phenomenon. They are well known for their foul-mouthed outbursts and racial gibes – a Muralitharan, Ntini, Gibbs, Caddick or Harbhajan Singh (albeit gave a few himself) have faced the brunt and can vouch for it. Big screens in major cricket grounds regularly flash the ICC anti-racism code, but it has little or no effect.

While the group was doing their preposterous deed, I was beginning to wonder: Here we have a group of people having a good time with mates or fellow cricket enthusiasts, watching cricket over few beers. It’s all good fun, they take the Mickey out of the players – which is OK as long it doesn’t get too personal (‘wanker’ chant , even though not terribly insulting, is over the line) and gradually or suddenly – I don’t know, they get incensed or get carried away with the fun and pass a offensive and/or racist remark. Why? You may think I have already answered the question in the previous sentence. The offensive and/or racist remark is the end result. My question is how they arrived to that stage which makes them utter those remarks. Why did their behaviour, which initially was cheerful and sporting, turn into a mob-like behaviour? Would each member of that group behave the same way if they were isolated from the group? Why, when together as a group, is there a deliberate suspension of decent and responsible public behaviour? Or does the mere fact of being in this collective presence give them an ideal opportunity to vent and display a false sense of ego? I do not understand this psychology.

I am sure certain individuals in that group would know, subconsciously, that their action were not correct. But they probably shun their conscience and went with the flow. Who ever are the individuals that composed the group, whatever their occupations, character, beliefs, intelligence – they let themselves down that day. Shame on you guys!

IMHO, the reason for this type of behaviour could boil down to the aggressive nature of Australian culture and the way of upbringing children in the society - parents inculcating right morals to their children at home and education at school. This type of behaviour is hereditary...so sadly, I don’t see it changing any time soon.

Oh by the way, NZ lost the test match. It’ll probably add more fuel to the fire for the Adelaide crowd.